Lately I've had a slew of people I've worked with who have been this way. I've had clients drop me out of nowhere, tell me basically that I'm not good enough, and treat me unkindly because they feel like they can. I get that businesses have to make business decisions or call me out on a mistake, but it's when people are mean and not professional about it is what rubs me the wrong way. Or when I know I didn't do something wrong and they insisted it was me. Where's the trust?! A few times I stood up for myself, but a few other times I just let it go. However, since I've had such a bad streak lately of mean people it's starting to affect me. I mean, after dealing with that so many times how could it not affect me? (Yes I'm going to include TSwift gifs in this post.) ;)
Don't get me wrong, I've worked with a lot of GREAT people that I got along with fabulously. And I am still working with some incredible people. When I start letting the negativity get to me I remind myself that I do have people that appreciate my talents and that I shouldn't let the negative experiences sour the rest. It's just that if I were to be honest the negative comments always sting the most, don't they?
And here's another thing. Freelancing = communication via email, Skype, and the phone sometimes, which gives mean people an excuse to be mean. They know they can't see you day to day. They know that if they say something tacky or hurtful that you have to just shrug it off because they are paying you and for the most part they think they can get away with it. Also, what if you believe in the site or brand you're working on? You just can't leave them high and dry, now can you? I've been in a similar situation like this a few times now.
I don't know why but I've had horrible luck with a few people in particular, and instead of cutting out I've held on because I believed in the site, wanted to make more money, or I had faith that things would get better.
Will things get better? I hope so. Will I find more amazing people who appreciate my skills and talents? I really want that. I need that. How can I learn from this going forward? Well, I can refuse to be treated unkindly and I can stand up for myself. For most of my life I've allowed people to step all over me.
"You're so sweet Sierra."
"Thanks for being there Sierra."
You're welcome?! I've improved with my boundaries and they're always a work in progress, but it's still very much a struggle for me. I want to be there for people but I need to learn to say no. To put myself first both personally and professionally while still being a stand out freelancer. And you know what? That's okay and I can do it.
Haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate...fakers gonna fake, fake, fake, fake...I'm just gonna shake it off, shake it off, off, off, off... (Yes I know I'm covering two totally two different songs in this post, lol.)
Yes I love Taylor Swift and whenever I start getting overwhelmed with mean people, I'm going to shake it off and also sing "Why you gotta be so mean..."
I already feel a lot better.
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